As I sit here listening to the melting snow tap tap on the various air conditioners, I wait for my 2nd telephone interview with a prominent law firm. As far I as know, I’ve done adequate due diligence and am prepared. I cleaned a temporary office space for myself in my bedroom. I’m also sitting at the same desk I most likely studied physics and The Tale of Two Cities on when I went to high school.
I ask myself. Do I really want to go back to work full-time? Do I really want to go live through a predictable 9 to 5 schedule? It wasn’t all that bad really. When I was working, before being laid off, I loved the walk to the subway each morning. It would start by my seeing kids walk towards their school, the same one I went to as a kid. Over the years, I watched them grow up; from fashionable kindergarten girls to little women on the cusp of hormone hell. The little boys became little men. Even though they still wore blue jeans and a t-shirt, as they got older they developed a bit of that street smart cool dude strut.
Once I finally made it into the subway, I’d do my good morning bonding with the familiar subway conductors and motor men. I knew most of them by their first name.
During my commute over the years, I even made two long time girl friends on the R train.
And yet as much as the morning commute was a gift, do I really want to have to answer to a Higher Presence as part of the corporate office environment? Knell when the higher ups walk by; humble myself with correct political decorum. Or am I imagining all this? I can’t help but think of all the past places I’ve worked. Fellow employees back stabbing each other by using gossip as there weapons; being reported to human resources for saying non politically correct comments; feeling like I’ll get my head chopped off if I don’t comply with corporate etiquette.
And all this within the enclave of glass and metal structures providing wall to wall carpeting and eternal florescent lighting; like a modern day cell.
True, the benefits are helpful. But are they worth the price we pay for them?